Professional help might be available via your health insurance if he needs medical assistance due to withdrawal symptoms (which, if he drinks every day, he might) or a specific substance abuse program may even be available under the mental health coverage in your plan. My husband was trying to time my contractions to see when we should go to the hospital. These are hilarious! Since I had to have a c-section he stayed in the hospital with me the 3 days sleeping on the couch and changed ALL the diapers. This happened to my friend. In labor with our second after my water broke at 6am. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. More than that is considered heavy drinking, and as previously stated 5+ on any one occasion is considered binge drinking. According to the World Health Organisation. They were 1 minute apart, which was not what the books and classes told us we should be at this early on. We had to track him down when it was time for my epidural and after that he fell asleep. Kept busy being a working mother of 3 children, one with Aspergers, renovating the original money pit and drinking too many coffees in the space of 24 hours. Thats it, just shut up and he was infuriated. Prodromal labor can be as painful and uncomfortable as 'real' labor. an hour later, he arrived 15 minutes before our daughter did. Check out this video to understand how to get your alcoholic spouse into treatment: Discuss the various treatment options that are available and find the best one for him so that he can get better as soon as possible. Oh yeah, and he lost like 15lbs over the course of 2 months without drinking. He will not only miss the labor, but likely years of your child's life due to alcohol related disability or death. He would still have had alcohol in his system and in hindsight, a cab or ambulance would have been a better mode of transport. When your partner needs help, they will reach out to you. I would have the conversation when he isn't drinking and is in a good mood. Driving drunk is a big effing deal. Lets just say that he ended up spending the night in the hospital with me. I would be concerned about YH having 5 drinks in one night on a regular basis. Seriously?? So, accept the fact and learn to deal with it. -Angelia, My husband went downstairs to charge his phone and call his mom from the car. I told him if I missed my epidural window I would end his life. I HAVE to join in here. It's too much. I waited in the car while my husband went in 5 minutes go by 10 minutes 15!!!!!! With my 1st son, my husband wanted to take a shower before we left for the hospital. For example, someone might have a problem with drinking but deny it to themselves or their loved ones to avoid admitting they have a drinking problem. And when they do, take them to the professional instead of trying to make things right on your own. (Nurses are usually fabulous but it is always nice to have your own personal support person). You have much bigger issues and should seriosly consider looking into alanon. Drink Red Raspberry Leaf Tea. He cracked jokes the entire time, including asking my medical team (all women in masks) what they were making in woodshop. My husband fell in a deep sleep and would not wake up to me calling him. Is this the best way though? I went it alone and met up with him after surgery where he was holding the baby smiling, refreshed and relieved. The. Once we got to the hospital, though, he was great. I'm so sorry that you are going through this, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Woo hoo! If you are having symptoms of preterm labor, call your healthcare provider right away. Sharing your thoughts and feelings with your spouse can help both of you cope with the emotional effects of recovering from addiction. -Katie. However, this might give you peace of mind for a moment. When in labor, every woman becomes bitchy for the reason that she is in tremendous pain, moron! If he won't deal with that, you should. This post and the responses make me want to bash my head against a wall. Know your own limitations. Not all men are alcoholics, or would make these choices, so stop generalizing all men to excuse your own husband's behaviour and choices (and your own choices to stay with him). She told him and he freaked out, made himself puke (totally tmi) and then was a paranoid mess the whole drive to the hospital. All I am saying is that it will probably work itself out in the end. There might have been pee before I got all hooked up. My mom didnt kill him, just in case you wondered. Well, watched is a bit strong, but it was on the entire time! lol. Listen to Token and others who have pointed out that there is a problem beyond driving to L&D. TAKE A SHOWER NOW!!! Why would you say that to me in THE THROES OF LABOR? With our third, he asked me to stretch out the pushing for 55 minutes so he would win the money pot at work. April 2011. A 'habit' of drinking more than 5 drinks in a night, thinking that he 'deserves' to unwind however he wants, these are signs that he dependent on alcohol. but this isn't just within my relationships i'd say it's with friendships and working environment - REALLY envy those that have any guts to say what they feel. I was on the bouncy ball for a half hour waiting and then went to check on him. My husband went home the next day and brought me some things, namely a mens xl t-shirt that said Wanna Play Doctor? on it. husband drunk when i went into labor. -Kirsti, My husband asked if he could borrow one of my pillows, because his back hurt and I had too many. My mom would have been my birth coach. Start by selecting which of these best describes you! He asked me to please give him a signal before I had a contraction (and they were, oh, 90 seconds apart) so he could mute the call in time. I watched a CSI marathon the entire time I was in labor. Now, I love Firefly, but I will forever associate Captain Malcolm Reynolds saying I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you with the start of the worst pain of my life. If that isnt bad enough, he dropped my right leg DURING labor, to show my doctor the outfit my daughter would be wearing home! And yes, I actually fix my hair. Not during labor, but our almost 10 pound baby ended up in the NICU for low oxygen saturation. I went home, took a shower, fed the cats, and came back a few hours later to strange looks from the nurses who cared for my baby while I was gone. Most of the responses ignore the real issues, blame it on men being stupid, or just excuse his behavior. Published: May. Wow, after reading all of this, I swear my DH is a god among men! First is, do you have a backup person who can be there for you? Who knows..just having a baby may wake him up and realize that there are more important things to stay sober for. I don't feel bad because he should have enough respect for me not to drink for a month. One of the most commonly talked about signs of impending labor, many women begin cleaning and re-arranging baby items in the days or hours before labor begins. I was prepped for emergency c-section and we had friends in boats out looking for him in the bay. Police raided a pregnant woman's home wrongly suspecting her husband stole a snowblower; she ended up in jail, in labor, and experts say, illegally in shackles. Amen. 26 years of marriage has taught me to make sure she is comfortable and has what she needs first and to be honest about what I need. So, feeling AOK, we walked up the hill to the party, socialised and I left Phil to continue cooking sausages and shooting the shit and took the other two kids home around midnight. Well when it was time for my epidural, my husband went home to take a quick shower and grab a bite to eat! I shoot him a look and he says oh, I thought you would drive. I was 7cm dilated when they checked me in. Then just before we were about to leave for the hospital, he looked at me and said, are you really going with your hair looking like that? . For instance, Mike made me wait in the lobby of our building while he went to get a cup of coffee from the bodega across the street. I had a hellish time trying to breastfeed my newborn son (turns out he had a tongue thrust issue and didnt latch on until he was 5 weeks old ) and in the middle of the hospital room, amidst lactation consultants and even a sucking specialist , my husband announces : Honey, let me show you, this is how you do it. Which is normally fine, but NOT when your in labor! good luck! My husband was behind me holding me up while I squatted when a nurse looked at him funny and said You dont look so hot. What will you do if you're away or home sick but the baby needs to go to the ER at night because there is something serious going on? Amy Dickinson. Suffer. This behavior will shorten his lifespan, increase his odds of developing certain types of cancers, raise his weight, sap his energy, and generally make things miserable. As soon as the dr left, I yelled at my hubby to get up and he acted offended! "Put. -Jennifer, We were out to a movie when my contractions started. Probably because I threatened him with bodily harm if he didnt. Well, it was getting late, and his sister called to see how things were going, and he smiled affectionately at me and told her that the contractions werent too bad yet. A few hours post-surgery I started having a strong adverse reaction to the epidural which included profuse sweating, intense itching and hallucinations. He didn't drink for the majority of my pregnancy, but then went out to a work function and came home wasted (he was driven home by a coworker). It's not good. I called my husband at work around 6 p.m. to let him know I was in labor with our first and he said hed be home to take me to the hospital as soon as he wrapped a few things up. When we finally got there and I was hooked up to all of the machines, he went downstairs and then returned with a whole pizza that he ate in front of me knowing that I couldnt eat because I was in active labor. Braxton hicks are most often painless or at the worst, uncomfortable. You have had worse contractions then that! When the nurse came in he had to tell her the same. Lydia Swortzel, 36, went into labor at 21 weeks with identical twins after seven years of infertility. The only way to stop this from happening is to let your husband know that you wont tolerate any unacceptable behavior of theirs under any circumstances. Thank goodness he was great the rest of the time or Id be a widow, not a divorcee. He still occasionally takes a beer, glass of wine or a rye down to the office when he's doing paperwork, but occasionally is the key word here. I write about that struggle & stuff. Unless yo ass is imoan. I wish men weren't so stupid about some things. -Tifffany, My husband took so many pictures of himself in the scrubs and mask (obviously super important to document) the camera battery was almost dead when we actually had the baby! Alcoholism is quite difficult to catch during the initial few meetings, but by the time you get to know about it, it is too late. LOVED reading all of the stories I thought mine was rare It really hurts. I replied, What the fuck is wrong with you? Mine said I was making a spectacle of myself while in an induced labor with back to back contractions. I was so out of it by this point (having no pain medication at all) that I did not know my husband had helped. -Carrie, My husband rested the magazine he was reading on my legs while I lay dying WITHOUT an epidural. My dad went out for tacos! She told all of the nurses to shut up and leave as she recovered. We women are quite wonderful really. Pleaseselect whether I bother you once a day or once a week. She just had another baby and he quit drinking 4 weeks before her due date just to be safe. IM IN LABOR, PEOPLE!!! Unfortunately, real life doesnt always abide by my blogging schedule and sis gave birth last Friday night! And that he has a choice to make but if he wants to "risk" drinking each night then that's his problem if he isn't there. Judging from the two phone calls I had with Uncle B while she was in labor (one in which he was right by her side at the hospital and the other in which he was buying her a box of popsicles), Id say he didnt screw his job up nearly as bad as most of your husbands did. -Amber, My husband made me wait for him to finish watching Gladiator after my water broke. I havent let him live that down. Apparently i was keeeping him awake. While having my first son, I tore from one end to the other. We get down to the car and he gets in the passenger side! Have you ever discussed this with friends and inquired about how much their husbands drink? Little things like uploading a profile picture make the community a better place. In order to do you, you might push your husband to loneliness, which eventually will lead to far more serious issues than now. Get weekly updates on baby and your body. Must have been all that digesting he was doing :S. Im currently being induced in 9 days, my husband actually says hes going to stay home for the fucking dog! Someone who drinks 5 drinks a night to "unwind" after work and is defending that decision in the face of being incapacitated for their pregnant wife has a drinking problem. You notice a mucusy discharge or "bloody show". Sis takes me to the hospital and gets hold of husband. You probably will NEVER be in that much pain but if you are, I sincerely hope you remember what you said! Here . I don't know how or when you've approached him about this, but I think if you haven't you need to make sure it is on the weekend when he's had time to relax. They can give you tips and suggestions on dealing with an alcoholic husband and the challenges that can arise during the recovery process. Oh well, possibly because it was the day before I gave birth to our 3rd child, Jack. Misty, My husband left me, when I was in labor, to go buy a PS3 (it was Black Friday). After 38 hrs of labor, My hubby looked at me, with this serious look on his face, while Im pushing our daughters head out, and saidwell that was easy, can we do it again? (It meaning have another baby)i told him sure, but you can carry it this time!, After I had a surgery on my left breast, my husband asked what he would were to an event!

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